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Rules of the Straight Man

With shows like Queer Eye and guys being metrosexuals, I think men need to learn how to be men again.

Rules of the Straight Man:

  • Women
  • Sports
  • Video Games
  • No Crying
  • No Emotions Around Men
  • No Chick Flicks

  • Don't Wear Gay Clothes

  • Don't Collect Gay Things

  • Don't Say "I like your outfit"

  • Don't Say "bye-bye"

  • Don't Say "something is fabulous"

  • No Boyfriends

  • Do it Yourself

  • No Talking in the Bathroom

  • Always Stand far Away from people at the Urinal

  • Never Look Down in the Locker Room


Straigt men have to like women if they didn't like women than they would be gay.



All straight men like sports, they like to watch sports and they like to play sports, exspecially football.


Video Games

Straight men love video games you never see women playing video games.


No Crying

Straight men don't cry no matter what they hold it in.


No Emotions Around Men

Men should never hug each other or tell each other their problems, if you have a problem you either figure out on your own or give up.

No Chick Flicks

Men should like action movies and comedies; they should never enjoy a chick flick.


Don't Wear Gay Clothes

Straight men should not were clothes with rainbows on them or little puppy dogs.


Don't Collect Gay Things

Straight men should not collect things like teacups or teddy bears, a lot of men collect dead stuffed animals or stuff like that.

Don't Say "I like your outfit"

Straight men should never tell another man he likes his outfit. You can get away with saying that's a sweet shirt or something like that, but don't ever call it an outfit.


Don't Say "bye-bye"

I don't think straight men should say bye-bye, there are a lot of ways to say good-bye so straight men should choose one that sounds less gay.

Don't Say "something is fabulous"
You often her gay men saying, "That looks fabulous" or something like that and I think straight men should stay away from that phrase.


No Boyfriends

Its kind of obvious that straight men should not have boyfriends, but you never know.


Do it Yourself

Straight men should always fix things themselves even if they dont know how.


No Talking in the Restroom

When in the restroom men do not talk to each other they just get in and out as fast as possible.


Always Stand far Away from people at the Urinal

When in the restroom you always go to the urinal that is farthest from any other person no matter what.


Never Look Down in the Locker Room

When in a locker room you must always keep your eyes above the waist.

Rules of the Straight Man